that's unrelated to anything else, i just thought it was funny. so.
this past weekend i went shopping. i needed hooker boots to wear out to the club next weekend. (because for my birthday, i want to be six foot three and intimidating.) anyway, you know how babies come from the stork and cheese comes from the moon and wars in the middle east come from trickery and lies? well, hooker boots come from hollywood boulevard, so there i went, with uccellina and monkeygurrl.
we went into a bunch of stores, perusing the g-strings and vinyl hotpants. there was one store that had a whole section devoted to garments made entirely of crystals and chain, and i'm pretty sure that were we rich girls, it could have turned ugly.
now, as a general rule, i don't like to be spoken to by people i don't know. this can make shopping unpleasant when there are sales predators on the loose, but fortunately, we wandered about relatively unscathed. in one store we were rescued by the owners having to corral their eight (possibly nine) year old child, as he ran around in circles amidst the undies and whips and things. i don't know why they were worried- that seems like a totally appropriate place for him to be.
we looked at some "sexy" halloween costumes, and though i had originally thought i might make my costume, i don't think i will have time. we threw around some ideas, like the classics (nurse/cop/schoolgirl), the trends (pirate), the pretty but generally indicative of a certain brand of craziness (fairy), and my personal favorite, the lying or honest whore.
i'm undecided. of course i want to be seen as attractive, but i have little desire to parade my ladybits around like waiter with a hors d'oeuvres tray. if i had a partner you know, we could do a theme. jeannie and major nelson! ground control and major tom! if i had a red headed friend, we could be ginger and maryanne. if she were blonde, dorothy shaw and lorelei lee! or should i go as something frightening? a zombie? a socialite? a president of the united states? or i could go as the scariest mannequin on earth:
any and all suggestions will be considered. please keep in mind that i am poor and also not an idiot. thank you.