it also turns out this is because of my *ahem* ALLERGIES. which i did not have until i moved here, but which i now have badly enough to fill my fucking ears with fluid. EARS FULL OF FLUID!
this also explains the constant sneezing, the runny noses, the sinus pressure etc etc. i've been taking claritin since we moved here because i figured that was part of it, but apparently, claritin is not enough.
claritin does not keep you from having your ears fill with fluid. and claritin does not help you to unfill them, as this process can take SEVERAL MONTHS.
also the dog will not allow me to spritz his nether regions. he screams and runs away and pees on the carpet. we tried doing it outside, but then he screams and runs away and makes the neighbors angry. so now we have to drug him orally, which means he will either be anorexic to spite me, or get even fatter from all the drug vehicles. vehicle of choice: hot dog. maybe i should get a weiner cutter (thank you robiewankenobie), if only to make it more entertaining when i have to toss the "meat" stuffed with antibiotics and antifungals down his stupid allergic throat.
now i'm at work, trying to work, but more like trying to blog and eat lunch (savory chicken with wild rice) except that everytime i try to take a bite i'm distressed by the fact that the wild rice is dirty looking and curled, and so looks like someone clipped his toenails into my allegedly savory soup.
it's freaking me out.
i think the fluid in my ears is a potent hallucinogenic.
licking my ears will be the new thing.