hypothetically, if i sewed my finger, and hypothetically, if i sewed it with a sewing machine, then hypothetically, ripping out the tiny zigzag stitching from my fingertip would really really hurt. there is an off chance it might bleed too, but not on the damn projects, because then i would have to do them all over again.
and then i might have to cry, or possibly kill people.
the reason i would endure such hypothetical suffering is the magnificent monkey, who because of an
after several attempts to conjure pants from mid air (monkeius pantimus!), i brought out the machine and fiddled around with patterns that would fit monkey's specific (and quite odd--sorry monkey) measurements. after many many tries that resembled everything from a muu muu to a creepy set of udders, i got this: voila!
they look less cool in the pictures, but i firmly believe that with monkey's hoo hah planted firmly inside, these pants will rock your world.
as hoped, this weekend was a time of great abundance on the martha front. i made thanksgiving, and washed my dog, and did laundry, and cleaned my house twice. once because it was dirty, and once because i spraypainted indoors. hehehehe. *glurg* i like fumes.
wait, you say. that's not really pain. who cares if you hypothetically sewed your finger into a lightning bolted mess?
well, that's not all. of course, details to follow, but briefly, let's just say my weekend involved needles (of the not-sewing AND not-knitting variety), lasers (lasers!), hot burning, cracking skin and the truest most awful pain of dishpan hands.
if you think you can handle the horror, i will see you tomorrow. see you through my vicodin induced haze, that is.