August 02, 2005
hypefest 2005: the year of the stink

so as you loyal eFriends know (all two of you), this weekend was hypefest, the film festival i had been busting my luscious butt for. i was the festival coordinator (it says so in the program. see me bask in the glory! bask, me! bask!) which means that i organized rentals and repeatedly contacted all the filmmakers/judges/sponsors/
industry guests/press etc to keep them updated and informed about what was needed and where they should be, as well as organizing volunteers for the festival and creating many necessary items, like badges and ballots and tickets. that's eight screenings at 200 tickets and six screenings at 200 ballots per screening, for those of you keeping track. not to mention the fabulous gift wrapped boxes to keep them in, because you can in fact judge a book by its cover. and a giftwrapped ticket box just screams professional.

so friday, after my "real" job, i speed home to change into something more fun (read: more boobies!), then speed on over to the lava lounge. where Boy and i are the first to arrive and so Boy stands patiently outside, listening to me ramble. like so:
so our sign in table should be right outside here with posters and my boxes and the lanyards, but we need to go in to set up the turkey and vegetable wraps. and didn't someone bring chex mix? chex mix is really weird. i always forget that i don't like it and eat some anyway. who do you think will come? are my volunteers here? i'm supposed to have some tonight. gee, shouldn't someone be here to let us in to set up? 'cause i'm pretty sure we can't do much with this door locked. we have posters and coasters and snackage to set up. are my volunteers here yet? do they want t shirts? *pause* what is that smell?

let me tell you. good thing blogs don't relay odor, and you are very happy that i did not have a digital camera. because oh the stink. we look left. we look right. we look down. and we realize that someone has spilled pea soup from one end of the lava lounge all the way to the other. except by pea soup, i mean chunky vomit. and it has been rather warm lately, so the smell was no little problem.

so we gave a boy (not Boy) a bucket and he washed it away. set up went smoothly, and then the people started to arrive. we had initially intended to have volunteers doing badge check in so i could float and mingle, etc. but the 1 out of 3 volunteers that came, well, she wasn't user friendly. having her be the first face of hypefest seemed like a good idea. a good idea like letting janice dickinson bowl with special people. so she was sent inside to clear plates, and i did badges. but only once enough incense had been shoved into the cracks of the wall to make the parking lot stink like a hippie. i have a sensitive snout. i said snout.

on saturday morning, i woke up with a horrendous cold. and i'm still sick. *sniff sniff* but i carried on, and we arrived at cinespace to find another door locked. we waited a few minutes, during which a full and fully sun baked trash truck stopped at the red light in front of us. for several torturous minutes. jokes were cracked about how bad smells were becoming a running theme. that's foreshadowing, people. it's a literary device. see dad, i use my edumacation. i use it real good.

then we were let in for set up. where we walked head first into about 7 bags of trash from the night before. sitting right up in the doorway. ahh, stale beer and garbage. it's the welcoming new scent from calvin klein. you know it's bad when the cold doesn't kill it.

volunteers came and went, the films were great, everything went as planned. until the sysco guys came to deliver for the night. and spilled scallop juice. all. over. the. carpet. right in front of our badge check in area. carpet! like fish doesn't already linger! anyway, we're thinking of changing the logo next year to read: hypefest presents short films, music videos, commercials, promos, and is the smelliest place on earth. bring your sars mask, and enjoy!

my three favorite films, in no particular order, and not that it really matters because no one i know saw them anyway:
1. "spam-ku" a man writes spam haiku and wins a lifetime of spam. or as spam? heh. spam. spam spam spam spam spam.
2. "sailor's girl" a woman provides paying customers with visions of their conceptions and deaths, but she can also see her own.
3. "six feet in seven minutes" a young man learns his parents have been keeping a very important secret. or two.

i would describe them more, but it doesn't do them justice. don't feel bad that you couldn't come. lot's of people couldn't make it. like all those people that i stayed at work so late making badges for? i'd say about 60% never showed. but i'm sure they were doing very important things. like sleeping it off or whatever.

i feel a little bad that everyone (hypefest people and filmmakers alike) put in so much effort, and while many people did come, many did not. more people show up to see clay aiken in a walmart. and that, my friends, is america.

damn proud to be canadian. that's right. i said i'm canadian. what are they gonna do about it?



2 Comments:

Blogger Beeb said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

Blogger Beeb said...

here i am....slight hiccup...i'm okay now.

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