August 24, 2005
a cow by any other name

as you may recall from my manic and nonsensical ramblings yesterday, i was very excited about a purchase to be made on my lunch break. which i made--and delivered to my home--all within one hour and without Boy's explicit knowledge.

so when he im-ed me yesterday afternoon to ask if i'd be coming home directly from work, and not stopping to buy anything silly or remotely ugly or very expensive, i was forced to respond thusly: (i said thusly... heh.)

have you been in the bedroom yet this afternoon?

for had he been in the bedroom already, he would have known the answer to his question. as he would have come face to um, face, with my new chair. in all its magnificent cow-ie glory.

cue mormon tabernacle choir's dulcet "hallelujah"

now stare deeply in to its resplendent cowie* hide...

so this is where i will be reading the yummie books you people buy me for my berfday, and also where i will be being all nana-like with my Bag O' Yarn. but don't you be thinking the cow chair is in its full and complete state of cowieosity at this very moment, because it most certainly is not.

once we move to the new place, the one without the bugs and mouse poops, i will be sewing beautiful new velvety throw pillows for my couch (which is this color) and cow chair in a color something like this. and because we are good tenants (potential landlords, be advised), we will of course require a throw rug to put beneath the royal cowiness. which Boy and i have decided should look like this.

any ideas where i can get a good deal on astroturf? oooooh! maybe i'll make a mini astro-pillow, too.

and i believe it's now official. i am martha on drugs.

anyhow, in honor of the expansion of our family, i hereby present the

the rules are as follows:
1. be creative. b! e! creative! *swooshes pompoms*

2. nothing really obscene. because i don't use those kinds of words. yeah you heard me right bitches.

3. suggestions must be made as comments or they will not be considered. this means you, Squiggle. 'cause i'm a-flushing out the lurkers. (and i'm doing it with a southern accent. y'all.)

4. the winner will be chosen by the end of the week. upon being chosen, said winner should email me an address to which i can send a prize. because prizes rock! i send good prizes!

now, valancy jane claims to be a world-class namer, so there may be some stiff competition. hehe. stiff. good luck!

*no actual cows were harmed in the making of this chair. or post.


Blogger Auntie Sassy said...

Everyone knows that a chair that looks like a cow should be called Engelbert Humperdinck. See the resemblance?
He even SOUNDS like a cow...or a squeaky chair.

Anonymous laurie said...

I go with the short and simple "Spot."

Love the astroturf idea...

Anonymous hutch said...

you gotta love "lucy"



Anonymous hutch said...

you gotta love "lucy"



Blogger Beeb said...

I think it should be named "HumpalotIguess" (hey it's close to Snuffleupagus- ok I just check my spelling on that word and holy sh*t it was right! I'm scared now.)



Blogger Beeb said...

go to for your


Let me know if this is what you had in mind... also, do we get to guess a couple names? and where did you get that chair? I love it!

Blogger Jennifer said...

Cozy Vanholstein

Blogger Tel said...

Barf. Short for Barfolowmew.

Blogger AnonymousCoworker said...


Or you could call it Frumpkin.

Blogger Sarah Smile said...

Ok, first of all, I love most of the names already suggested. I was actually going to suggest "Bessie" myself.
And I laughed out loud at "Jezebel." Hutch, dear, I like you.

Hard to top "Jezebel" but here are my suggestions.

"Rump" You know, like a rump roast, plus it's really fun to say. Try it. Say "Rump." Say "Who's sitting on my rump?" or say "I'm relaxing on my big comfy rump." Fun, right?

"Tiger" or "Goat" Just to be confusing.

"Rev. Lee" When asked, giggle and refuse to discuss it.

Or just go with "Jezebel." Frankly, it's hilarious. Even a Queen knows and can admit when she might have lost a battle.

Blogger Jill said...

How about Zeus? At one point, Zeus appeared as a white bull, more beautiful than any other, that smelled of flowers and was so gentle that all the maidens rushed to pet it. I'm ignoring the fact that Zeus didn't have black spots but the rest of it fits!


Blogger Grend31 said...

It's very clearly..

a "beef-o-lounger".

Blogger MooCow said...

Hee hee. I like "Goat."

I thought it was going to be easier than this...The "best" I can come up with is...

Sir Moos a Lot
Norman (ala City Slickers)'s what's for sitting.

Blogger Pink Lemonade Diva said...

Congratulations on your new purchase - it looks so comfy. The power of a great reading chair can never be underestimated.

Blogger Grend31 said...

If it were a recliner..

I'd call it a Boviner.

Blogger Mo-Pie said...

If it were a cow, I'd call it "Hide". If it were not a cow, I'd call it "Fauxy (Hide)"

It's a Girl, call it "Heidi", Boy, call it....
... "Theodore"? No, I got it, "Hyde".


Anonymous Chris in MN said...

I like the classic cow names.


Drifted to your blog from reading Crazy Aunt Purl's comments. Very fun!

Anonymous Squiggle said...

Well my dear Kendra, you already KNOW that I am going to win. Why did you not mention this in your blog? Why did you not tell the poor name offerers that I was already the first to tell you a name and that my name was the best? (yeah, I forgot what I told you now, LOL) Anyway, now that I have seen said chair, I know it should be called Coweeze, in honor of your love of Snoop. Or possibly the following:

Nitterific, the reading spot
Barns & Noble, since cows live near barns and barns and noble sells books and you will be reading books on it! I am so smart, I know ;)
Where the happy bumble bee rests (no need to explain this to you)
Repunzel the Resplendent (spelling error was intended so that the beginning of Rapunzel and Resplendent matched)
Does everyone give up now, cause I could keep this up all day! ;)

Ok, I will give others a chance now, I will see you tomorrow K dog! ;)

Blogger JenL said...

How about Ferdinand? But be sure to always have a vase full of flowers nearby.

Blogger Grend31 said...

If you wish to blame shenanigans upon it..

call it "Harvey".

Blogger MooCow said...

Since you'll end up falling asleep reading on it at some point call it the "Bull-dozer."

Blogger Grend31 said...

Or you could just call it MooCow.


Blogger Joseph Smith, Jr. said...

Interesting blog. Enjoyed reading it.


Joseph Smith Jr.
Book of Mormon Online

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