and i know it shouldn't matter if i do it while he's around, but here's the thing. it does. to me.
i was once upon a time involved in a relationship wherein there were no boundaries on these things. and let me tell you. it got to me. i now prefer a little mystery. i don't need to know every little thing about a person. especially things that involve fluids. which led me to the decision that Boy does not need to know about the faeries, or the seventeen assorted deodorants i keep on hand because using any individual type too often negates its effectiveness, or the gnomes that pluck my eyebrows while he's sleeping.
he will continue to think until the end of time that i awaken freshly powdered and smoothed and glossed. because i want him to.
seriously, he knows that i don't. he's seen me all nose-crusted boogery and sweaty-backed vomity. actually, one time i got "a little bit" drunk at this restaurant he took me to (accidentally, of course) and i threw up in the parking lot. and then he kissed me. no tongue, but still. that's love people.
so he knows that these icky-type things occur. well, he didn't know about that one thing till he read yesterday's blog. (dammnit, internet. how could you just tell him my secrets like that? i thought we were friends. next thing i know you'll be sending him links to herbal enhancement and naked pictures. slut.) he just doesn't need to see it with his own eyes. we'll consider his knowledge of my basic human functions an act of faith. like when he let me put eye drops in his eyes last night.
and by let, i clearly mean "shouted and struggled like a trapped animal as i sat on his chest and pried his eyelids open with tiny crowbars."
entirely unrelated, you'll notice the comment spammers are back. does anyone have any suggestions on how to chase them away? and even more unrelated...
tommy lee started college last night. and i loved every minute of it. but you realize that "cornhuskers" sounds a little dirty right? especially when he says it?